Practice What You Preach
Written on July 23, 2026
“Practice what you preach.” This is a phrase we are all familiar with. From my perspective it falls under that category of integrity. If someone asked me what integrity means to me I’d probably answer with something like, “Say what you mean. Mean what you say. Be who you say you are, even when you think no one is watching. Let your actions match your words.” I think “practice what you preach” is another way of saying this.
This is a phrase that we typically say to another person.
But how often do we say it to ourselves?
I recently wrote a reflection entitled There She Stands on the values I live by and now use as a guideline within my relationships. They include integrity, communication, and radical responsibility.
I knew when I put it out there publicly, I was likely going to be given opportunities to put this into practice more. It’s been my experience that when I make a declaration of any kind, the universe will step in and say, “Oh yeah? Are you sure about that? Let’s see.”
Back in my religious days I used to advise people to never pray for patience unless they wanted to be given more opportunities to practice patience. Praying for patience did not result in God handing you a dose of patience. It resulted in more frustrating experiences that gave you a chance to build your patience.
The underlying principle has transformed a bit, but the lived experience is similar.
Before, it was something like:
"If I ask for patience, life will test my patience."
Now it's become:
"If I claim a value, life will give me an opportunity to embody it."
Practicing my own values isn't the hard part anymore. That has become well-embodied. The new muscle is holding those same values inside my relationships.
I used to leave a lot of things unsaid. Or I would speak my truth clearly… it would be ignored, and I would let it go. This only created resentment.
Now I’m choosing differently. When a problem arises and I see it’s due to one of my values being rubbed the wrong way, I speak up. I discover if the other person is willing and able to meet me where I stand.
Holding these values up to my relationships, communicating them clearly, and choosing not to abandon my feelings on integrity, communication, and radical responsibility for the sake of maintaining a relationship takes practice.
And that is easier said than done. Especially for those of us who have spent a lifetime in “people-pleasing” mode.
As predicted, life has handed me several new opportunities to communicate my values, expectations, and needs within relationships of all kinds. While this has created some uncomfortable situations, I am proud to say that I have stepped up to the plate and practiced. I am embodying this in real time.
The unexpected gift in all of this for me is experiencing other peoples’ desire to meet me where I need to be met. To repair when repair is needed. To earnestly listen, hear, and receive what I’m saying with a desire to build a healthier relationship. To be received this way is new for me.
I believe that this gift comes, in part, because I have done the work to identify the values I live by and I now express them openly within a variety of relationships.
Practicing what I preach no longer means proving that I can live by my values. It means allowing my values to shape the relationships I choose to build and the ones I choose to release.
Holding my values doesn't determine the outcome. It simply creates the conditions for truth to emerge. Sometimes that truth leads to an ending. Sometimes it becomes the beginning of a healthier relationship.
This is just another step in the journey of coming home to myself.
Angela Dawn
Helping people come home to themselves
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